A funny article I found in the eugene daily Emerald

Infamous Sex Offender Caught in Dollar Store
by Robert Belmont

EUGENE, OR -- This weekend Eugene police arrested Ricky Belmont, the infamous sex offender whose catch phrase involved women touching their pussy with their hands.

Police were informed when Eugene resident, Marsha Bobbett heard a man screaming "TOUCH YOUR PUSSY WITH YOUR HANDS," at three in the morning on a Sunday a few months back.

The perpetrator, Belmont, was caught three days later in a dollar store harassing a young lady named Barbara Stessen. Belmont was naked in the kitchen utensil isle trying to masturbate with barbecue tongs. He approached Stessen with the tongs yelling, "NOW YOU TOUCH YOUR PUSSY WITH YOUR HANDS."

Eugene police linked the cases together and charged Belmont with two counts of disturbing the peace, one count of public nudity, and two counts of sexual assault. The second count of sexual assault was given when Belmont tried to use his penis in the credit card machine.

The police are holding Belmont with a 150,000 dollar bail until he faces trial sometime next month. Eugene city police commissioner Dale Heartly commented, "We do not know if Belmont's actions were due to insanity or some substance abuse, but he is doing fine in prison except for his constant masturbation."