Man Orders "Freedom" Fries in France

by Robert Belmont

ANGERS, FRANCE - Saturday at around 12 p.m. Nicholas Hinman, a 20 year old exchange student from the University of Oregon, ordered what he called "Freedom" fries with his hamburger at a small cafe.

Hinman's order didn't mix well with the French waiter, Jacque Cousteau. Cousteau proceeded to yell at Hinman in French, in words he did not understand.

Bystanders said Hinman pulled a French flag out of his "man-purse," ejaculated on it and rubbed it in the waiters face screaming, "HOLD THE MAYONAISE I HAVE MY OWN." Hinman then proceeded to take off all his clothes, wrap himself in an American flag and run throughout the streets of Angers singing the US national anthem.

The French police are determining whether Hinman's behavior was an act of protest, terrorism, or pleasure. A reward of 10 euros has been put up by the French police for information regarding the whereabouts of Hinman.

Introducing...The Jello Pack!

Have you ever wanted to eat Jello on the go, but can never remember to pack enough to satisfy your Jello needs? Well, the thinktanks over at R-O-B Enterprises have just the product for you! The Jello Pack©!

Features:

-Refrigerated, 44 ounce Jello reservoir
-12 pockets
-Padded straps
-A/C adapter
-Speakers and headphone jack

Included with Jello Pack:

-100 assorted colored straws
-2 Crazy Jello Straws©
-Authentic Jello baseball cap
-A/C cord
-4 D batteries
-64 packs of assorted flavor Jello©

All for only 6 easy payments of $24.99


Copyright R-O-B Enterprises 2009

Things I Do Like! (xanax edition)

1. I do like new socks.




2. I do like 1.5 TB hard drives for under 200 dollars.








3. I do like Wild Turkey.





4. I do like Vicodin.





5. I do like Blackberrys.





6. I do like High Definition Audio and Video.





7. I do like Gordo's Burritos (which I really need...badly).





8. I do like ssh.





9. I do like Andres Segovia.





10. I do like skateboards.

All I have to say is wow

World of Warcraft is the worst game of all time.

I have no doubt about this. It's not because it's bad in the sense that it's an unplayable game, even though it is.

It sucks people into it, some have actually died from playing it.

Today I was sitting in class and a girl in front of me was playing World of Warcraft. I was thinking, this has to be the most retarded waste of time ever.

That is the main reason that it is the worst game of all time. Because it actually takes away from your life rather than adding to it by entertaining it takes away by sucking your time up.

To express what this game does to people I give you a snippet from a conversation I had with Trevor today, who is an avid player:

(15:59:10) monty: dude im in fucking newswriting class and this girl in front of me is playing WoW on her laptop
(16:00:46) Tre 2 Da Store: what lvl is she
(16:00:51) Tre 2 Da Store: and clas
(16:00:53) Tre 2 Da Store: class
(16:01:08) monty: dude
(16:01:15) monty: who the fuck cares
(16:01:18) Tre 2 Da Store: <---

Other than this I don't have any evidence of this, I haven't done any research and I don't wish to. This is all just based on my unrivaled opinion.

Fuck world of warcraft.

-Monty