4th of July

Local Feud Gets Resolved

SAN FRANCISCO, CA -- After a fight that broke out over who is better at file sharing, two guys kissed and made up.

The dispute started when local vegetable salesman, Sean Tai, ignited a cigarette while standing next to Philistine contributor, Rock & Roll Rowley I.

Rock & Roll Rowley I (right) moments before he and Sean Tai (left) brawled.

“I didn’t even hear him walk up at first,” Rowley said. “But by the time he started talking it was fuckin’ over.”

The two followed their initial encounter by exchanging empty gestures and casual conversation, until Tai brought up his long overdue need to move from Windows Vista to Windows XP.

“Monty had been saying for months how he would hook me up with some Lenovo recovery discs,” Tai said. “I was at my wit's end.”

The discussion deteriorated rapidly to a debate over who had the best ratios on numerous torrent sites, that the two fighters happened to belong to.

“They’re both faggots,” William Smartt of Smart(t) Investments® said.

It was unclear who threw the first punch, but when the smoke settled it was even less clear as to how the two had resolved their disputation.

Thank heavens it’s over though.

Movie Review: Beauty Shop

Name: Beauty Shop

Actors: Queen Latifah, Alicia Silverstone, Andie McDowell, Mena Suvari

Awards/Nominations: BET Comedy Award (Nominated), Black Movie Award (Nominated), Teen Choice Award (Nominated)

Plot: A wonderful comedy about a woman (Queen Latifah), who buys a barber shop in the Atlanta "ghetto" from a local hairdresser, after she is fired from a posh hair studio. Queen Latifah battles with the startup costs of a small business and the mistrust from patrons of the previous owner. After her one of her old clients (Mena Suvari) shows Queen Latifah's "secret" conditioner to the corporate heads of Covergirl in New York, the world is at her fingertips.

Review: I thought this movie was a very inspirational comedy for the person curious about small business. The black stereotypes in this film were oh so very on-point. Birdman plays the local thug, who rolls on 22's and calls all the women "shawdy," while a woman rolls her friend chicken cart into Latifah's hair studio selling to the patrons. Like most other Queen Latifah movies, she plays the large woman in charge influencing everyone and their mother. I watched this movie on BET which completed my cultural experience with commercial breaks featuring Wendy Williams, and Monique pushing their horrible talk shows. Overall this movie made my night, maybe even month. Oh and Alicia Silverstone plays a black woman.